My feet deserve all your holiday cash and gifts!!

My slaves know my rules! If you have a birthday, I get your presents.  Same goes for Christmas and any other holiday. You tell me what you got, and I'll decide if you'll be sending it to me. So collect all your fucking gift cards and other shit but know that most of it will be coming straight to me where it belongs!

FIGHT UPDATE

IT WAS A GOOD FIGHT, BUT I WON...AS ALWAYS!

BIG MMA FIGHT THIS WEEKEND FAGGOTS!!

You fuckers need to do your part! Had one of you bitches order me a scale a few days ago so I could keep check on my weight. After my weigh-in tomorrow, I WANT ONE OF YOU FAGGOTS TO PAY FOR THE HUGE FUCKIN MEAL I PLAN TO HAVE AFTER I MAKE MY WEIGHT. WHICH ONE OF YOU FUCKERS IS GOING TO STEP UP AND PLEASE ME TOMORROW?

You faggots need to fucking clean my cleats...

...with your fuckin faggot tongues!!

The election is over...

...now get back to licking my feet and paying my fucking bills!